I will always love you...

I wish I felt loved again

I wish I felt wanted again.

Because that's how I feel. I want him and I love him.

What has changed? Did I change? My feelings did not change. But the gestures I have gotten from him is different.

I am not the important one anymore.

And it hurts to feel like my existence is no longer important or even worse, even if I misunderstood, it is just left to be and no more explanation.

Even if my actions were misunderstood, I seem to be the only one who cares. Why did it became like this? Why you don't seem to care anymore?

Or is all these done to make the separation easier? Is that necessary?

My soul mate no longer talks to me anymore and i felt like, a stranger has taken over his soul. Someone who couldn't care less.

Maybe. The simple explanation is that. He just doesn't love me anymore. That hurts. It hurts me. It hurts my pride.

What happened to us? I thought we'll always be friends. But right now, I feel like I need to prick and pry every single time

Hate the fact that he is tired over me.

Hate the fact that he had ever doubted my love

Even though I asked many times. I never doubt the love he has. Even though there were no messages at all.. I would still bug and ask, but deep down I just know and remember what he said, that ill always love you no matter if we are far apart.

Hate the fact that I have to beg and beg and sk what his innermost feel or thoughts are. He just simply won't talk to me anymore, nothing nothing nothing. Y_Y. What did I do wrong? I have only love and take whatever hurtful things that happen and swallow it.

Heart

My heart is aching

Let it be

Can I just let it be until we are no longer physically in the same location anymore?

Another day

I can feel it coming. Early awakening. Increased sleep.

I am grateful that I still have a place to spill my feelings.

However unimportant I am, however insignificant my thoughts and feelings were, at least here I am able to dictate what I say or do.

I wish things can be fairer.

I wish I didn't have to feel this way about a good news. Because it makes me feel evil and I dont like that.

I want to know. What is the purpose of giving this test to me. To test my durability? I know I will see it in the future. The reason why all these right now is so hard.

Whatever it is, I hope one day, it will all be okay. Please let it be ok. Please. I don't think i have begged or wanted something so badly that I can lower my pride and beg so much for something like this.

This is not me.

I miss my confident self. Everything is gone. My confidence, my pride, my wisdom. Please let me win it back.

A sheet of brown paper

I receive a brown sheet of paper that includes the temple and also his number. Is that a sign?????

I have so many mixed feelings. I can feel strongly on one side and also another. What am I gonna do. The love story is gonna end soon. Am I still inspired to face the impossible? I don't know.